Wedding Wednesday -- our wedding had a logo

I am usually better about writing if I have a "regular column" so to speak.  Since I had no time or mental focus to write about the wedding while I was planning, I thought maybe I could share some of it now that it is all said and done.

Something I realized early on in the process were that weddings had ....evolved, shall we say?  There were so many unnecessary and over-the-top new things that people were doing, I felt really out of the loop. But one of the bandwagons I *did* jump on was having a wedding logo.

Sounds ridiculous, right?  Trust me, I put that thing to GOOD USE.  I found One Fine Soiree on etsy, and after a few emails back and forth describing the look and feel I wanted, she sent us 4 amazing samples, and we chose the below.

I used it for the stamps for our wedding invites, made thank you notes out of it, put it on welcome bags, put it on the cake bags, MVP used it as part of his gift to me....I even used it as my facebook profile pic.  

But I think my favorite use was our wedding card holder.

You guys, I had the WORST TIME trying to find a card holder that was not super corny or look like it was highly flammable.  When I finally DID find one I loved....well it was two weeks out and they could not ship it in time.  

Then, I got an idea.  On my OWN and not from Pinterest!!  I swung by Homegoods and got a large glass apothecary jar for like, 12 bucks.  Then I taped a print out of the logo inside, busted out my favorite Sharpie paint pens and went to work.  

And voila -- a card holder that is not only un-cheesy, but something that can be used in our home in some way.  Super proud of my crafting skills on this one!  

Is there something you crafted for a wedding or a kids birthday party or some other event that you are still patting yourself on the back for? Do tell!

Grown up paint-by-numbers

Last night I went with a friend to Blush-n-Brush in Georgetown. It's a painting class where you bring your own wine/beer and snacks -- pretty brilliant idea, right? I mean I have done many things while drinking wine -- shopped online and ordered things I didn't need, responded to work emails, cooked Thanksgiving dinner, texted people I shouldn't...about time I added painting to that list!

You start out with a blank 16x20 canvas. Seeing that white space was a little intimidating to me -- was I going to be able to get it to look like the example at the front of the class? Was I going to screw it up? Thanks goodness there was the wine there to take the edge off and help the creative juices start to flow.


Our teacher walked us through the different stages of this particular painting, but I was still nervous. Was that too much black? Did I need some more purple up in that corner?


Then I started to remember what I loved about things like this -- there is no "right" way. Becoming a grown up, playing by the rules, following plans and reports at work....all those things have made me forget what it's like to just do something and not worry about if it's right.

We moved on to putting in the outlines of our vase and flowers. I admit I was a little timid at first and outlined my vase in blue before perfecting it in black. Such a wuss. Then some of that wine kicked in and I threw all caution to the wind and started just going for it and painting those flower outlines in black.
Such a rebel, right? ;)


At this point my biggest concern was getting paint on me. I will happily embrace my inner artist, just as long as I don't get too messy. God I can't wait to screw up my future child by trying to keep them mess free at all times. I am happy to report the only thing that got paint on it other than the canvas was the wine bottle.


So after some coloring in and shading and quick-drying it with a hair dryer, I ended up with my very own work of art. Pretty nifty, right?



This was SUCH a fun time - the only downside of the whole evening was a group of friends who happened to be in our class. They all arrived at different times so they were sort of spread out all over the classroom. This didn't stop them from yelling things across the room to one another. We lucked out with the one girl sitting accross from me at our table -- and by lucked out I mean I thought I was going to drop my artistic-zen vibe to slap her upside of her head. She turned everything the teacher said into a "That's what she said..." joke. EVERYTHING. I think the teacher wanted to slap her as well.

Bad joke-girl aside, I totally loved this place and am already hoping I can convince some other people to go back with me. It would be fun for a birthday, girls' night, bachelorette party. Heck, I even think it would make for a really fun date. Much less creepy that trying to recreate the whole pottery thing from "Ghost"

Any DC peeps out there want to go?

She's crafty...

...and she used to get around but now she is a grown up and actually does crafts. That pretty much sums up me over the last couple months. Inspired by reading (way too much of) The Grosgrain Garage, I have gotten into the habit of focusing my creative energies into some crafty projects outside the office. You know, since very few law firms are lauded for their creative crafty skills.

I started with making wreaths after getting inspired by a posting on that blog. This is one I made for my Pop Pop's house down the shore.



That isn't even one of my favorites (I really liked the Hokie wreath I made for L) but some of the other ones are little gifties for a few peeps who may read this and I don't want to spoil any sort of surprise.

And I love making them, but c'mon. How many wreaths can I make before I get wreathed out? If anyone has any wreath-specific requests, send em my way and I am sure I can accommodate you.

So I have been going back to her blog looking for some more craftspiration (yes I made that up, but the word totally fits) and lately she has been posting about embroidery. Like she is monogramming clothing and towels and things at her house. And then she posted something that she embroidered a monogram on. Anyone who knows me IRL (that's in real life, people) knows that if there is a spare bit of space on just about anything, I will usually find a way to slap a monogram on it. Or at the very least, an initial.

So all throughout this off-the-charts crazy day at work (I am actually on a conference call as I type this posting....helloooooooo multitasking!) all I can think of is "How the hell do I teach myself embroidery??? And how quickly can I monogram everything in my apartment???" Hopefully L isn't reading this and if she is....just kidding!!! I would never be able to monogram everything in the apartment. I am short, and some things are out of my reach :)

Am I all grown up? Or have I run out of time?

Labor Day unofficially signifies the end of summer and the start of football, school and all things Fall. I was kind of curious about the actual history behind it so I looked it up as I usually enjoy a good bit of history. Essentially , the first official federally recognized Labor Day has to do with President Cleveland rushing a national holiday through congress out of fear of further conflict after the deaths of union workers at the hands of the US Military during the Pullman Strike in 1894. Yeah, doesn't exactly make me want to eat a hot dog and light a sparkler either.

But this day is always supposed to be a working man's holiday, a day off from your day-to-day grind to relax and unwind a bit. I wish I was able to do either. I have had this nagging, growing unrest related to all things "work" lately. It's much different than my previous position where I just got exhausted even thinking about the work week ahead of me because I knew with unwavering certainty that it would be filled with running around, long days, late nights and constant pressure. Believe me, I am glad I am not faced with that each week.

Now it's more of a look ahead into....nothing. Nothing to excite me or motivate me. Nothing to set my sights on and set a plan in place to reach the goal. Just an expanse of basic humdrum everdays, with the occasional stressful proposal or asshole lawyer thrown in for good measure. And every Sunday night I have this thought over and over and over in my head as I try to get to sleep: this is not what I wanted to be when I grow up.

I know that is a thought shared by lots of other people out there. We find ourselves in jobs and careers you may have never even imagined doing. Never went to school and studied for. Life happens and sometimes you just sort of fall into things; that's certainly what happened to me.

When I was really little, I wanted to be a princess when I grew up. This was obviously before I knew you had to be born or marry into royalty, there wasn't a whole training program and application process.


Then I went through a phase where I wanted to be a paleontologist. I wish I could say I was making that up, but it's the honest to god truth. I have an obscene amount of dinosaur knowledge because I read countless books on the subject when I was around 10 or 11. Like encyclopedia-sized books. I am sure at some point I realized that wasn't going to work because a lifetime of khaki-colored outfits and limited ability to accessorize would probably drive me crazy. **Side note, while the movie "The Land Before Time" had nothing to do with my dinosaur infatuation and desire to be a paleontologist, I love, love, love that movie and dare you to watch it and not get choked up. I could watch it today with all of its sub-par animation and still cry like a baby like I haven't already seen the movie 1,653 times**

Later in life -- like way later, towards the middle of junior year of college -- I thought I wanted to work in higher education for the rest of my life as a univeristy administrator. There was something special to me about being on a college campus that made me want to work on them for the rest of my life, the familial feel that you got just being on the grounds of one drew me in and really seduced me. Then I spent a year after graduation actually working in the field as I studied for and took my GREs and applied and interviewed at schools noted for their Higher Ed Admin programs. And actually working in it made me question my desire to go back to school to learn how to do it.

So late in the game, I did my own sort of hail mary pass by applying to one school for its Film program. I thought if they accepted me without any portfolio of work from undergrad, it was a sign that it was what I was supposed to do. They did, so I said yes. Don't worry, I question my own decision making abilities too and so does anyone who has ever met me. But those two years I spent studying and learning and creating were some of the most exciting times in my life. My track of focus was writing and I spent two years telling stories and creating characters. I worked harder than I ever had at it, but knew I was good at it. And I was happy.

And that wasn't really a surprise to me because I had been writing and telling stories ever since I was very little. As early as second grade I was winning awards for my short stories (soooo.....between this admission and the paleontologist bit, I have pretty much admitted to being a HUGE childhood nerd, huh?) I excelled in my English classes and in any project where a creative eye and imaginative thinking was needed. Taking tests has always made me want to break out in hives. Oral presentations and lengthy papers? Easy peasy.

Writing and essentially telling stories is what I have always loved best. And just because I haven't made my profession in it, doesn't mean I should ever give it up. So what am I getting at with this LOOOONG winded Labor Day posting?

I wanted to say thanks to those of you who come here from time to time and read my little stories and musings. I know there are some that know me from "real life" but there are some I have never met and that is beyond cool to me. I hope that first and foremost I always manage to get a smile or laugh out of you, but second I hope I can make you think about something or show you a viewpoint that may be different from your own. I also hope that if you enjoy it that you keep coming back and maybe tell a friend. Because I know of so many people (famous and your average joe) that have been able to do the elusive and take something they love doing and turn it into something bigger. And for once I will go out on a limb and say "Why not me?" Only reason it can't happen is if I don't try.

So my Labor Day resolution (New Year's is overrated anyways) is that I am here on this little blog to keep writing and to keep trying. Because I don't feel like I have gone and completely grown up yet. I think there might just be some time left to try and be something that I wanted to be.

Creativity is a big YAY

I have always been what I would call a competent cooker. I got a lot of good italian cooking know how from my Gram and I can hold my own in the kitchen. But baking....love it. So fun. Makes me feel creative again and I miss being creative in work. And I miss being creative in life in general. Now that my roommate works a later schedule that me, I feel like sometimes I don't really get to see her. Those that know me well know I have a need to try and make people laugh and my roommate is a great source for testing my material :)

It can be a little embarassing owning up to being a bit of a creativity dork. I don't feel the need to hide my time in the high school drama program or that I took Art so that I could get out of Gym class. Then I move on to discussion of starting college as a dance major (and staying one for two years) and letting myself go get that Master's in Film and Visual Media. I do all that and still don't think of myself as a creative person. Because all of that is my weird-o version of normal.

So when I go home excited over baking some new cupcakes with a twist and that becomes the most exciting moment of my day, well I overlook it. When I get home, and get moving with my baking and put on my itunes in the background and sing and dance along with my cooking....well theres a good part of me that knows that's not normal. But I know I LOVE it and have so much fun doing that. And some other texts with the new person confirm...this is not the "norm" by any means. Not everyone else dances around and (gasp) sings when they cook and bake in the kitchen.

Those people are missing the creativity gene that I have been reminded again I am so THANKFUL to have. Of course no one knows where it comes from since I have that jock and a brain for parents. Well someone somewhere in my family had to be creative....and I thank them and give them a big YAY

Wow. Seriously, wow.

SO there are a few people who are actually reading this thing. I am not trying to bulsh*t you when I say I am totally surprised (in a fantastic way) and will aim to be better. Seriously, if I have to backfill posts at this point, oh god help me.

I have a bunch recently that I thought I would like to post about so I will need to pace that out. A friend commented that you could run out of things to write about...I really don't think I could. I know, I know that must sound like total crap. I'll try to explain - in a roundabout way of course.

Have you seen "Up In The Air"? No? You should. I really recommend it. Its one of the few films I have seen in the past 8 or so years that I wished had come out when I was in grad school. So that I could have great conversations about it or write an incredibly brilliant and insightful paper about it. Cause I used to do that, you know in my former life :)

So I loved this movie for a ZILLION reasons. I like that it's a commercial film (more or less) that makes a statement about our current day life. Kind of love that aspect of it actually. How technology has moved us and distanced us all at the same time. I kind of bond with George's character for the fact that he is just distant from his family. Not by choice or on purpose....but just that that can happen while everyone maintains an aura of knowing what everyone else is up to. My mom knows if I am going out of town because she sees my facebook status update. My Dad knows the cost of a gallon of gas in VA (yes, he does ask about it) because he's learned how to text to ask me about it. See these advances in technology doesn't make us closer. Just more informed.

Most people know me know I HATE talking on the phone. A very few people get a pass on this one -- V and A come to mind -- but by and large, no phone thank you. And I cannot tell you why that is. I was never attacked by a phone as a small child or anything similarly traumatic enough that would cause my phone phobia. I think it may be one of two things. First, I have to have far too many long, boring and painful phone calls for work so I think that makes me inherently hate talking on the phone. Yeah, I know that's a sweeping generalization but come on, just work with me here.

The other, is that I am a person who has grown accustomed to being overlooked, unheard and just sort of glanced over. Now, I am not trying to get all heavy and Dr Phil or anything like that, but that is just me. That's who I have always been to groups of friends. The one in the background. I usually put everyone else first ad no one ever asked me to do that....it's just what I am preprogrammed to do. I think when you become increasingly used to no one caring about what you might have to say....well then you don't say it out loud.

This post may have been a little too self indulgent for my tastes, but I got to writing again, so that's a good thing. It's all about taking baby steps. So getting (eventually) to my earlier basic point is that no one else is talking to me about these things and my thoughts...so I really do have plenty to post. True, its because I have a lack of anyone willing to listen to my ramblings but hey, that just means I have more to write here.

Looking for signs

I have been having a lot of mixed feelings about work lately. Towards the end of 2009, I left my old firm for a new one -- still keeping the same type of job and responsibilities and switching to a slightly different title. It wasn't going to be same old same old; I was going to be working in new subject areas and supporting different practice groups and branching out into more PR and branding responsibilities. I also was primarily leaving my old firm because it was just an unbearable place to be....lack of support from my boss, unrealistic expectations of our department, always working late into the evening and usually coming in on the weekend, in short it just felt miserable. It wasn't just me; there was no joy in the workplace. Very little lighthearted banter, lack of support for one another or willingness to help each other, and a general sour attitude that felt like it just permeated the majority of the department. I knew I was good at what I did...I just couldn't be my best professional self under those conditions.

So I made the move to a firm where I would have a better work/life balance, more support from my bosses, and an assistant to help me properly manage the workload. And I am still good at what I do, and as a bonus usually get to work a 7 hour day (yup, 7). I have been getting great feedback from my bosses. I have been impressing the attorneys and other staff I work with and as a result getting involved in higher level projects and asked more for my professional opinion and suggestions.

Even with those really positive things going on in the workplace, I have been realizing recently that those nagging, lingering feelings are still there. The ones that keep ringing in my ear "This isn't what you always wanted to do." "This isn't making you happy." "This isn't the best use of your skills and abilities." I think my judgement was too clouded at my last firm to be able to see the forest for the trees. I just thought all of the unhappiness was a result of the horrible, miserable working conditions. And yeah, a lot of it was a result of that. I know I am happier and better adjusted now that I am not spending most of my waking hours, seven days a week in a windowless office.

Now that those gray clouds have cleared and I can see things better...well, I am worried. Worried that I shouldn't be doing this and I made a wrong turn somewhere. Even more worried that I can't undo that turn. I don't really know if it's "normal" to feel this way. Maybe I have put too much thought into it or maybe I have set the bar too high for what I hoped to do with my life or get out of (or put into) my work.

An organization that I am a member of for work will soon be holding their annual conference. I had the opportunity to go two years ago and found it incredibly helpful. While my firm is on a tight budget leash these days (really, who isn't?) I found that the local chapter of the organization was offering a scholarship essentially -- you wrote a super short essay and the judges would award two "winners" all the expenses for the conference - hotel, airfare, and registration. I thought it must be a sign. I could get myself there and maybe get the career kickstart I needed. So I sent off my little essay and could already picture myself there, drinking the KoolAid and getting my batteries recharged. But the winners should have been notified by today....and I didn't receive any notification. And I find myself a lot more upset and disappointed than I thought I would be. The slightly irrational part of me thinks this is some sort of sign, of what I am not sure.

So I came home today, a little upset and a little defeated. Not sure of what to do about it or really if there is anything to do about it. I try to tell myself all the time that lots of people doubt their jobs and if they are doing something that they should be doing. Right now that affirmation is not doing diddly squat for me.

Then I flip through the TV and "Breakfast at Tiffany's" is on. That should be a sign. Of what, I'm not sure. But I like this sign much better than the other one.

Kickin’ it back to the old school…

So it’s Ash Wednesday and I find myself mulling over the same question as I do every year, “What am I giving up for Lent?”

I will try for back-to-back years of giving up soda. This is so hard for me, but after last year, I know it can be done and my apologies in advance if I am especially cranky this next week. The first week or so always seems to be the hardest.

However I got to thinking (which is almost NEVER a good thing!), since I gave this same thing up last year, it doesn’t really seem like as big of a challenge, you know? Those other popular sacrifices like candy, chocolate, and sweets don’t seem that hard for me to give up either because if they aren’t around, I simply don’t go out and seek them. I’m the person who bakes for fun and then gives all the treats away - I bake more for fun than to actually eat anything I make.

So I thought back to my fine Catholic grade school education, where every year someone would inevitably proclaim they were going to give up homework. Even at a young age, we were all still looking for religious “loopholes”. It was always then that our teachers would remind us that Lent is a period of reflection and bettering ourselves. In addition to the sacrifice of giving up something we enjoyed, we could always make a better effort to do kind acts or be more considerate people. For example, if we were good students in a particular subject, we were encouraged to offer our help and tutor other students in that subject. That whole “making use of the gifts and talents that God gave you” sort of a thing.

This year in addition to going sans soda (I actually just frowned typing that), I am going to challenge myself to write something here every day. When I was growing up, I wrote all the time. I rounded that out with a Master’s Degree focused in writing and then….well, life happened. Dreams and things you are passionate about sometimes get pushed aside due to time or circumstance or a million other reasons. Lent is just as good an excuse as any to dust off my writing cap, put it back on and give this a shot. So right here, every day, for the next 40 days, I will be posting something. Well, the next 39 days since today counts as day 1. How will this be different from all of your other friends’ blogs out there? Good question. Let me try to respond with a bulleted list (this use of bulleting should prove I write for lawyers FAR too much and need to get back in touch with my creative side):

• I don’t have kids (yet anyway), so alas, there will be no hilarious tales of junior peeing in a potted plant of spitting up his breakfast. I do have a couple of fully grown adult friends who I could see exhibiting those same actions after a late night out though, so stories may oddly stay the same.
• I don’t have some cause I am uber/over-the-top passionate about. I am not a die-hard Dem or a Ridiculous Republican. My politics are my beliefs and I prefer to keep them to myself for the most part and not let people see/hear about them from a mile away. No offense to those who are passionate about their parties and very involved. It’s just not my thing and doesn’t define who I am. I also raise money for the causes and charities I care most deeply about, but don’t really feel the need to always wear the t-shirt or slap the bumper sticker on my car.
• I am not on a super cool extended vacation or wandering all over the world. God, I wish I was! So there won’t be any funny stories of dinner with a monkey or pictures of me hiking up a mountain. I won’t be riding any exotic animals or eating any new and strange cuisines. And while I do sometimes feel like riding Metro is a daily adventure, I’ll try to refrain from making it sound like DC public transportation is anything like trekking the globe.
• I don’t have some amazing/exciting/interesting job. Let’s face it, if I had some job that gave me a sense of being professionally fulfilled and like I really used my talents every day, maybe I wouldn’t feel compelled to start writing a blog a day for the next 7+ weeks. If nothing else, any reference to my job will likely make you feel better about yours.
• I am not on some sort of personal “journey” to be chronicled. I am not training for a marathon, or trying to become a vegan. I am not remodeling a house or trying to learn a new language. All of those things sound perfectly nice….and like I would perfectly want to shoot myself after about a week of any of them. (No offense marathoners/vegans/home remodelers/language learners!)
  

So what the hell am I going to write about? Good question. Only way to find out is to keep reading over the coming days and weeks. I promise to stick to it if you promise to bust my chops and hold me accountable. Who knows – this blog a day regimen could very well make giving up soda look easy peasey by comparison.