Thursday, August 9, 2012

Thoughts on Thursday

Because I just need to take a little break and mentally dump out and get rid of things that are weighing too heavy on me right now.

Work has gotten back to a really bad place for me.  It's often feeling so bad that I don't know if I see a light at the end of the tunnel.  If anything, my only reprieve may be a bearable day or two here and there, but the majority of days being not good. 

I could deal with the frustration or the hardship a little better if it wasn't every day....or if it just meant longer hours.  But really, the situation has gotten to a point where I feel unable to do my job well.  I would really like to come in here each day, try my hardest, get some things done, treat others kindly and with respect, and wrap up at the end of the day and go home. 

Instead I find myself tensing up as I get closer to the office in the mornings, running around like crazy, not getting help or guidance, colleagues who don't play fair (or just leave me out of the loop entirely) and I leave each day feeling like I have been beaten up.  And I feel like I have little actual work done for the day and nothing to show for all my efforts. 

I can't talk to MVP about it because it stresses him out and that, in turn, makes the whole situation worse for me.  Right now I feel really alone.  Alone in my office all day, alone on a ledge (so to speak) on most of my projects, alone on figuring things out.  Just alone. 

6 comments:

  1. Blah. That sucks. I know...I hope things take a turn for the better soon.

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  2. I could have written this same post. It has to get better for both of us.

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  3. So sorry things sucking right now. I wish I could offer words of comfort, but I don't know what to say. I'm spending my days looking for a job which is a different kind of misery

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    1. Cupcake!! How are you, I have been wondering where you went and how things are going....

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  4. Girl, you need a new job and my advice is buck up and start looking - ACTIVELY! I went through this as you know and looking back, I should have left the job long before I did. If it's gotten to the point (which it also had for me) that you can't even talk to those closest to you about it, it's time for a change. Even if you end up at a job that pays less, if it saves your sanity, it's worth it. Live NOW, it's what matters! And if you're not happy in the now, get happy by making a change!

    Sorry if this is ranty - I just don't like hearing you are still going through this :(

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    1. Trust me, MH. I have been trying like hell. I have been actively looking for almost a year.

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